Even in old silent home movies I was always a song and dance man.
I love this kid. He reminds me of myself when I was in school… if I had freakishly long, beautiful hair.
(Source: youtube.com)
I’ll never know why I do the things I do. One day soon the little space mice inside my cranium that control this organic robot body will get bored and escape through whichever ear is facing the sky while I sleep. They’ll high five each other for a job well done on convincing the public that this “person” named Lance was real and somewhat coherent. Then the two alien rodents will scurry into the yard outside and mate with the closest wild mice they can find, like sailors on their first visit to a foreign port. Meanwhile, the leftover carcass of my being will awake and carry on through life operating on autopilot and physical memory.
Currently I’m not so convinced this hasn’t already happened.
We interviewed Nathan Schwartz, the 12-year-old boy-king of Rap Instagram.
What’s the worst show you ever saw?
Trinidad Jame$ in Tampa. He’s just a boring performer. And the crowd is made up of all swag and YOLO types of people.
What’s wrong with YOLO and swag?
Nothing’s wrong with the words, just people who say it a lot are annoying.
This kid is a friggin’ genius.
Nothing says love like a puppet.
He’s my favorite judge in Miami.


